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Wednesday, June 4, 2014

Romance Meets Life

Romance Meets Life

Nigerian Woman Deported From the UK, She Wanted Asylum From FGM, Boko Haram and Forced Marriage

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 01:35 PM PDT


A Nigerian woman with two daughters was fighting deportation to Nigeria and seeking permanent residency in the UK but has been deported back to Nigeria. She claims that her 2 young daughters could be subjected to female genital mutilation, and she herself forced into marriage if they return to Nigeria.

Afusat Saliu, 31, said she also feared that she and her daughters, Bassy, four, and Rashidat, two, could be targeted by Boko Haram. She was given a reprieve last week but lawyer Bhumika Parmar said the family has finally been deported yesterday.




More from the BBC

Afusat Saliu, 31 and daughters Bassy, four and Rashidat, two, were "removed to their country of origin" on Wednesday, the Home Office said.

Her lawyer Bhumika Parmar said she had spoken to Ms Saliu in Nigeria, who was "really upset at the situation".

The Home Office said the case had "gone through the proper legal process".

Ms Saliu fled from Nigeria in 2011, claiming her stepmother had threatened to subject Bassy to female genital mutilation (FGM).

Ms Saliu, herself a victim of FGM, was pregnant at the time.

'Individual merits'
The UK Border Agency arrested Ms Saliu and her daughters on 28 May.

Ms Parmar said she would continue to fight her case and that permission had been granted for a judicial review.

In a statement, the Home Office said: "We consider every claim for asylum on its individual merits and in this case, the claimant was not considered to be in need of protection.

"The case has gone through the proper legal process and our decision has been supported by the UK courts on five separate occasions, while the European Court of Human Rights declined an application to halt the removal."

The family was held held in a detention centre before the deportation. A previous removal order on 30 May was delayed by the Home Office.

More than 120,000 people have signed a petition calling on the Home Office reconsider the case.

Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick Pregnant With Third Child

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 11:13 AM PDT


Kourtney Kardashian is reportedly pregnant, and expecting her third child with partner Scott Disick. Kourtney and Scott are not married yet but have been together for more than 5 years and already have two children together - Mason, four, and Penelope, 23 months. The couple will reportedly welcome their third child into the world in December.

According to Dailymail,

A source said: 'It was planned. Kourtney wants to have a handful of kids.'
Another source added: 'She is only a few months along.'
The 35-year-old star was said to have a radiant pregnancy glow about her when she and Scott stayed at the Trump SoHo hotel in New York after returning from her sister Kim Kardashian's wedding to Kanye West in Italy last month. A source said: 'Kourtney looked really pretty. She had a nice flush on her cheeks.'


Big congratulations to the couple!

Bodies of 800 Children Found in Septic tank at Former Home for Unwed Mothers - Catholic Church Responds

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 08:15 AM PDT


The Catholic Church have now responded to the grim discovery of the remains of up to 800 unidentified children buried in an unmarked plot beside a notorious Mother and Baby Home in Ireland, claiming that the mass grave was a temporary solution and the infants remains are "just resting" there. I find this response disingenous and heartless.

The bodies of nearly 800 babies are believed to have been interred in a concrete tank beside a former home for unmarried mothers. The dead babies are thought to have been secretly buried beside a home for single mothers and their children in County Galway, Ireland, over a period of 36 years.

It is suspected that 796 children were interred on unconsecrated ground without headstones or coffins next to the home run by the Bon Secours nuns in Tuam between 1925 and 1961. Newly unearthed reports show that they suffered malnutrition and neglect, which caused the deaths of many, while others died of measles, convulsions, TB, gastroenteritis and pneumonia.

Monsignor Sean Green, spokesperson for the Irish branch of the Catholic Church Scandal Containment Unit, said;
There's a lot of speculation as to what went on in The Home following these recent revelations. People seem to believe that because these children were born to unmarried mothers the church at the time considered them sinful and unworthy of a decent Catholic burial, so basically threw their little remains into the nearest hole they could find.

But trust me, that wasn't the case; I assure you, those bodies are just resting in that mass grave. Cover up the mistreatment of children? Not at all. We've always planned to exhume them and bury them properly, and we're going to get right on it really soon.





The babies were usually buried in a plain shroud without a coffin in a plot that had housed a water tank attached to the workhouse that preceded the mother and child home.

No memorial was erected to the dead children and the grave was left unmarked.

The site is now surrounded by a housing estate. But a missing persons' report just filed to Irish police, gardai, means that the burial site may now be excavated.

A relative of one boy who lived there, William Joseph Dolan, has made a formal complaint to gardai after she failed to find his death certificate, despite records in the home stating that he had died.

A source close to the investigation said: 'No one knows the total number of babies in the grave.

There are 796 death records but they are only the ones we know of.

'God knows who else is in the grave. It's been lying there for years and no one knows the full extent or total of bodies down there.'

The existence of the grave was uncovered by local woman Catherine Corless, who compiled the records of 796 babies who died at the home. She has established a group called the Children's Home Graveyard Committee to erect a memorial.

Read more - Washington Post, DailyMail, WWN, Irish Central

Image - Children's Home, Dublin Road, Tuam, Ireland circa 1950. (Courtesy of Catherine Corless/Tuam Historical Society)

Scout Willis Explains Her Topless Photos To Protest Against Instagram

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 06:02 AM PDT


Scout Willis, is the 22-year-old daughter of actors Bruce Willis and Demi Moore, and she recently protested against Instagram, the social photo sharing site by walking topless through the streets of New York City. Instagram does not allow nude pictures on the site, so scout posted her topless photographs on Twitter, and has now followed it up with an essay in XOJane.

Read her article below and share what you think of her actions. Should women be free to move around topless like men and share naked photos on social media?


For the record, I've always really loved Instagram.

Earlier last week I decided to do something kind of crazy. Instagram had recently deleted my account over what they called "instances of abuse." Which in reality amounted to a photo of myself in a sheer top and a post of a jacket I made featuring a picture of two close friends topless. For these instances of abuse, I was politely informed that I would no longer be welcome in the Instagram community.

My situation was in no way unique; women are regularly kicked off Instagram for posting photos with any portion of the areola exposed, while photos sans nipple -- degrading as they might be -- remain unchallenged. So I walked around New York topless and documented it on Twitter, pointing out that what is legal by New York state law is not allowed on Instagram.

What began as a challenge to Instagram and its prejudiced community guidelines became an opportunity for dialogue. Matters like the taboo of the nipple in the 21st century, public breastfeeding, slut shaming, fat shaming, breast cancer awareness, body positivity, gender inequality, and censorship have found their way into mainstream discussion. But unfortunately the emphasis in the press has been on sensationalizing my breasts, chiefly in terms of my family.

I understand that people don't want to take me seriously. Or would rather just write me off as an attention-seeking, over-privileged, ignorant, white girl. I am white and I was born to a high profile and financially privileged family. I didn't choose my public life, but it did give me this platform. A platform that helps make body politics newsworthy.

I am certainly not doing anything novel. A group here in New York called Topless Pulp gathers in parks to read topless regularly, and the Free The Nipple campaign has been protesting for the same rights for the last four years. If my coming from a high-profile family could help spread their message, so be it. I am not ashamed of who I am. And for every nasty comment I received there were ten more of support, appreciation, and empowerment.

There are also some people who would criticize my choice to relate nipples with equality at all. To me, nipples seem to be at the very heart of the issue. In the 1930s, men's nipples were just as provocative, shameful, and taboo as women's are now, and men were protesting in much the same way. In 1930, four men went topless to Coney Island and were arrested. In 1935, a flash mob of topless men descended upon Atlantic City, 42 of whom were arrested. Men fought and they were heard, changing not only laws but social consciousness. And by 1936, men's bare chests were accepted as the norm.

So why is it that 80 years later women can't seem to achieve the same for their chests? Why can't a mother proudly breastfeed her child in public without feeling sexualized? Why is a 17-year-old girl being asked to leave her own prom because a group of fathers find her too provocative? Why should I feel overly exposed because I choose not to wear a bra? Why would it be okay with Instagram and Facebook to allow photos of a cancer survivor who has had a double mastectomy and is without areolas but "photos with fully exposed breasts, particularly if they're unaffected by surgery, don't follow Instagram's Community Guidelines." Until this weekend women were afraid to post photos of their mastectomy tattoos -- realistic or creative -- for fear that Instagram would delete their accounts.

I am not trying to argue for mandatory toplessness, or even bralessness. What I am arguing for is a woman's right to choose how she represents her body -- and to make that choice based on personal desire and not a fear of how people will react to her or how society will judge her. No woman should be made to feel ashamed of her body.

I never claimed to believe that my actions of the past 48 hours would solve anything -- far from it. But what they did achieve was to provoke conversations about gender equality and body positivity that are both necessary and sorely lacking. I am humbled to be part of any action that's helped push the discussion of women's rights into the spotlight. Which is where I believe it should remain, focused on what's really important and most certainly not on me as an individual.

So, while I still think that those who don't support the movement should simply unfollow me, I call out to every person moved by this to take physical -- as well as digital -- action, and help transform what started out as a casual topless stroll into something resembling true change. While in the meantime, my breasts and I return to a more casual form of a protest beneath my favorite sheer tank top.




Actor Jonah Hill Apologizes For Using Homophobic Slur Against Paparazzi

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 05:19 AM PDT


Jonah Hill was shown in a video clip recently cussing out at a photographer with a homphobic slur. The actor has now told radio host Howard Stern that he lost his cool with the paparazzo and is really sad for using the "disgusting" word.

Celebrity gossip site TMZ early Tuesday morning released a video of the incident in which Hill tells a man following him to "Suck my d---, you f-----."


CNN reports that the actor - nominated for the Oscars in 2011 for Moneyball and in 2013 for The Wolf of Wall Street, told Howard Stern he never meant to insult gay people.


"I played into exactly what he wanted and lost my cool and in that moment I said a disgusting word that does not at all reflect how I feel about any group of people," he told Stern.

TMZ posted a one-minute clip shot by a photographer who at one point mocks Hill's shorts. Hill said the photographer had been following him all day and saying "hurtful things about my family."

"It would break my heart to think that anyone would think, especially with all the work that I have done and all the loved ones that I have, that I would be against anyone for their sexuality," Hill said.

Hill added that he has long been a gay rights advocate. Before the Winter Olympics in Russia, Hill took a public stance against Moscow's anti-gay laws. He tweeted: "Help us show Russia & the world that #LoveConquersHate" while wearing a T-shirt bearing the hashtag message in Russian.

Daddy Time - Ali Nuhu and Son Vacation in Dubai

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 04:48 AM PDT


Actor Ali Nuhu shared this picture with his son Ahmad who turned  8 years old on 30th of May. Father and son are on vacation in Dubai with some other members of their family. Ali Nuhu is more prominent in Hausa speaking Nollywood, and I first saw him in Confusion Na Wa, where he was quite impressive. See more photos below...

19-yr-old Seeks Justice After Testing HIV-positive Following Gang Rape - Video + Photos

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 04:02 AM PDT


Helen (surname withheld to protect her identity) will be 20 years on October 10. But she now bears a burden that is too heavy for her age. She was gang-raped in January this year and was diagnosed with HIV last month. Due to the heart-rending experience and the medical diagnosis that followed, the once cheerful and vivacious



After secondary school in 2008, Helen wanted to further her education, but being the fifth of 11 children comes with its own challenge. "Na the condition of no money, na im prevent me from going further," said Helen when asked why she had not bothered to continue her education.

Despite her background, Helen was unperturbed. Determined that she would return to school some day, she began working as a cleaner in a big firm at Lekki, Lagos, from where she hoped to save for school. She had worked there for almost a year before the tragic episode that altered her life dramatically took place. It was with a deep emotion that she recounted her ordeal.

All was quiet and the street lonely early that Tuesday morning when the unsuspecting lady set out from her Bariga home to resume her morning shift at work. It was at exactly 5:05am, the same time she often left home everyday to board a bus some streets away to Lagos Island. But that morning, something was not right. She noticed five young men lurking about as she got out of her street's gate. On seeing their fearsome appearance, her heart skipped a beat.

Consumed by fear, her first instinct was to turn and run back into the street, but it was too late. She had been spotted. "They blocked and grabbed me. They pointed a gun at me and told me to be quiet and do everything they said I should do, or else they would harm me,"

Helen said before she was overcome by emotion. After a short silence that seemed ages, she added: "I tried to shout but when I looked around and did not see anybody except those guys, I was so afraid and did as they said… They, then, carried me to one corner by the side of the street… (She bowed her head). They asked me to lie down." Helen went silent again with head still bowed, to hold back tears. She said: "I begged them to release me, that I was on my way to work and that I didn't have anything to offer them.

They told me to shut up, saying they would waste me, if I didn't like my life. I begged them to spare my life." Her plea touched a member of the gang; he said she should be freed. But his statement fell on deaf ears, for Helen's other attackers were determined to carry out their task to the letter.

Fighting back tears, she said: "The others said he could leave if he wanted to; they then collected my handbag, my purse and the N5,000 inside with my two phones – one was in my hand. I used its torchlight; the other was in my Jeans pocket. They removed the phone, pulled off my trousers and started violating me (Silence)…They asked me to pull off my clothes. I begged them."

Her face became contorted as the agony of the incident swelled her being. Helen became silent again. One could see she was fighting to hide several conflicting emotions as she recounted. "But was there no way you could have shouted for help?" the reporter asked in an attempt to douse the tension. "There was no way I could have shouted because there were five of them against only me… I was so scared. So, I just kept begging them to release me."

As her attackers were beginning to enjoy their violent act, they spotted another young man and lady walking towards them. Helen's attackers also pounced on the couple, robbing them of their valuables at gunpoint. Two of them also raped the second lady. By that time, Helen's eyes were already swollen, from her trauma and obvious helplessness in the hands of the crooks. The two men raped the girl while the other three continued raping me," she said in a subdued voice.

On how she felt when her violators had their turns, Helen, in tears, said: "I swallowed my scream, felt very bad and closed my eyes as each of them…(Silence). For my mind e be like say make I get knife take kill them, because it was a very painful thing to experience. Before they started, I had asked if they had condoms but they said 'No'. ''

After they finished, all I could think of was running to the hospital and getting some drugs or treatment that could wash everything away from my whole being: my physical body, heart, soul and all. (Again, she lapsed into another silence). I felt very bad and, somehow, dirty."

After the incident She ran back home to her sister. Both ladies cried in silence; they felt ashamed to share with neighbours what had happened. As if that was not enough, while nursing the psychological trauma of the assault she got, another shocker happened to her on the same day. Helen discovered that her violators were her neighbours. "I recognised them: two of them live opposite my house. Before that time, I did not notice them. I see them every day and cringe; I'm always in fear each time I see them," she said.

Three months after Besides the traumatic rape, Helen has fallen into a worrisome medical condition. Last month, she was diagnosed with HIV at the General Hospital where she was rushed to after she was raped. Before then, Helen said she had been "negative", adding that she knew through a test she did some time back. "When I went there when it first happened, they asked me some questions, gave me some drugs and told me to come back after three months for more tests.

The three-month period lapsed last month. The hospital did the followup test and found that I have become HIV-'positive'. ''I felt bad, very bad; and I cried. In fact, the doctor tried to calm my mind; but I kept on crying that 'I'm finished'. I wanted to take my life because I never expected this to happen to me. They told me life still goes on and that I can still live my life to the fullest. They say people with HIV are can be healthier than those who are negative with the help of drugs.

Before I left the hospital, I cried and begged them to help me because I did not plan to live on drugs for rest of my life," she said. With tears dripping freely and looking straight at the reporter as if to find answers on her face, she continued: "What kind of life can one live now? I feel so bad; I feel so weak and I am asking myself: what did I do wrong in this life to deserve this? What will happen to my dream of going to school? I have not been able to save for school, and I now am treating HIV."

The news of her status has added more sadness to her family who were still recovering from the shock of her violation. "When my parents heard the news, they were very sad and they all cried," Helen said amid tears. The 20-year-old has since turned an advocate, seeking justice against her attackers. After living in fear for months, the dread of the rapists forced her and her sister to relocate last weekend.

The move has emboldened to seek for justice, feeling she is beyond their reach. "I want justice. I need help. I want those men to go to jail for what they did to me and perhaps many other ladies in the area. These people cannot be allowed to go free. Everybody knows them as thieves in the area; they do not go to work or school but just hang around all day doing nothing.

Still nobody has done anything about it. It is almost as if they are using charms. Their father is a very aggressive landlord. I see them always and I'm always in fear; that's why we packed out of the house last weekend. You won't believe that till we packed, my attackers are still using my phone," she said.

Helen's sister, Stella, who was also in her 20s, said the whole incident has left the family heart-broken. Stella, who learnt a comforting hand to her sister, said: "We felt so weak and very unhappy, but there is nothing else we can do but to support her and pray that those crooks would be made to pay and suffer for what they did to my sister."

- THE NATION

Kim Kardashian Covered up in Full Length Maxi Dress in First Photos After Marriage

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 04:00 AM PDT


Kim Kardashian West was photographed yesterday for the first time after marriage to Kanye west in a full-length maxi dress. This is the first time the newly wedded reality TV star was going on a social outing since returning from her European honeymoon with Kanye.


She was headed for a birthday celebration in LA and her full skirted long gown with sleeves past the elbow was a marked difference from her usual figure-hugging and sometimes skimpy outfits. Many are wondering if the black and cream folksy dress is a sign that her fashion style has been made more demure by marriage. I, personally, don't think so. I think the dress looks great on her though.




Images - Splashnews

Beyonce's Pastor speaks on the Criticism She Gets, Calls It Censorship

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 02:34 AM PDT


Beyonce attends the St. John's United Methodist Church when home in Texas, and humanitarian and author Rudy Rasmus is a co-pastor at the church. Beyonce's parents Tina and Matthew Knowles, as well as her best friend Kelly Rowland, have also been members of the church for a long time. Rudy Rasmus was also the minister that joined Jay Z and Beyoncé when they got married in 2008.

He was interviewed by The Grio and says when asked of the criticism from some parts of the public, especially Christians, who denounce her sexy videos, explicit lyrics in her songs, and some of her outfits while performing on stage.

"Beyoncé is a consummate entertainer, and an entertainer entertains.

Is the entertainer's entertainment an expression of that person's life and reality? I don't know.

But I know when Arnold Schwarzenegger straps on a 30 caliber cannon and blows planes out of the sky, nobody asks the question, 'Arnold why are you walking around for those 90 minutes in that suit with that 30 caliber cannon? What kind of person are you?' I don't think I've heard that question.

But at the end of the day, Arnold Schwarzenegger is an entertainer.

I think a person has the right to earn a living in the way that they are gifted, and I think that she is tremendously gifted and I think she expresses that gift in some amazing ways.

I think the world would be void an extreme talent if we silenced her or censored her."

The pastor also spoke about Beyonce and Jay Z's relationship that it is stronger than ever. "They're friends. Their relationship is healthy and life has been good.".

Watch the interview below;

Rihanna Twerks Plus Speech After Receiving Fashion Icon Award From the CFDA

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 02:21 AM PDT


Rihanna was at the Council of Fashion Designers of America (CFDA) fashion awards event held a couple of days ago in New York. She made headlines with a see through glitter dress made only of fishnet and swaroski crystals, and she also got awarded as the Fashion Icon of the year. After picking her award, Rihanna went backstage happy and doing an improptu twerking dance for her audience.

The statuete was presented by Vogue editor, Anna Wintour who said of Rihanna;

Rihanna speaks to her fans with her every look. And what she says to them — and I include all of us in that group — is that it's fun to feel a little boyish one day and dress up like a dazzling diva the next. I think that's what she was going for tonight. [crowd laughs]

The point is to be audacious, even jaw-dropping or button-pushing — and yes, we know she enjoys pushing buttons — while remaining true to yourself.

She proves that incredible style can help take a talented young woman from a small island to the world stage, and along the way spark a lot of conversation about elegance and empowerment." 

As part of her off-the-cuff speeach, Rihanna talked about her growing up years in Bardados and wha fashion means to her. She said;

Growing up I didn't have a lot of access to fashion. But, um, as far as I could remember, fashion has always been my defense mechanism. Even as a child I remember thinking, 'She can beat me, but she cannot beat my outfit.' And to this day I mean, that is how I think about it. I can compensate for all my weaknesses with my fashion. And so really, you really can … I enjoy the most that you can tell so much about who someone is just by their style — the way they put fashion together.

And I think fashion has been an outlet for me to express myself, to speak up, to say who I am and to be very loud about it at times, and I just like to have fun with it. Fashion is just a world of thrills, it's exciting, there's no rules, there's just … I mean, SHE has tons of rules [gestures at Anna Wintour, audience laughs] … Scratch that! Scratch that! [More audience laughter.] There are RULES! But rules are meant to be broken. [Audience cheers and claps.]

I want to thank MAC for being so supportive and for keeping my face so cute. I want to thank all of the stylists who I've worked with because it's steps, it's stages to get here, and now I can't believe that we're here at the CFDA awards. Mel Ottenberg, thank you! You GET ME. You honestly get me, and you understand what I'm trying to say.

I can send you two pictures, and you bring back the rack full of exactly what I wanted. There's nothing better than that because fashion should never be frustrating. It should be fun! Make it easy to me. I want to thank everybody here tonight, my friends, my family for being supportive, thank you guys! Good night.

Watch the video of the full presentation and the twerking below...

Marriage Avowals - MC Abbey and Wife Jumoke Constantly in Tune With Each Other

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 01:15 AM PDT


MC Abbey, a comedian, is married to Jumoke, a chartered accountant. The couple got married on Dec 8, 2007 in Lagos and are blessed with two kids Erinayo daughter and son Onaopemipo. In the interview below, they talk about their union to Punch.



How and when did you meet?

Mc Abbey: I was anchoring a beauty pageant and she was one of the contestants. I went back stage and introduced myself, but she said she was very busy and could not attend to me. I left but some weeks later, I met her in my church. She was leaving after the first service while I was going in for the second service. I called her and she recognised me but she wanted to dodge so I told her to give me her number. She gave me the number and I dialled it. I ensured that the phone rang while she was there, so that she would not deceive me.

Jumoke: The first time he approached me, I sincerely thought, "Who's this dark-skinned, short man that thinks he can just walk up to me and start running his mouth?" It turned out that he had met me before at a beauty pageant, which he compered with Ali Baba. I was a contestant, and he just wanted to re-establish contact. When he asked for my number, I almost gave him the wrong one, but something told me that this guy is smart and would most likely dial the number. I gave him the right number and he dialled it immediately. We were friends for a year before he asked me out.

At what point did you realise the relationship was moving towards marriage?

MC Abbey: I did not make my intention of marriage known to her until we were friends for one year because I needed to know her very well.  When I told her, she thought I was joking and she set up a meeting between me and her pastor. She wanted to be convinced that I was serious.

Jumoke:  I didn't take him seriously at first. I told him he had to be younger than his looks. He convinced me about his age by showing me his driving licence. I told him to try the next girl if he was not in for a serious relationship because I was not looking for a boyfriend.  He told me he was serious.  I started taking him seriously when I got a confirmation from God that he was the man for me.  Before I met him, I dreamt of getting married to a tall, fair-skinned man. Thank God I didn't walk by sight. If I had, I'm sure my life would have turned out a lot differently.

What was the main attraction?

Jumoke: Like I said, I did not set out to be wooed by him. I just liked (and still do) the fact that he always made me laugh uncontrollably whenever he called. I didn't even know he was a comedian at first. Also, he is a man of integrity, and the goodness of his heart always shines through.

MC Abbey:  Her beauty was the first thing I noticed the first day I met her. I observed that she was not just beautiful, she was a combination of beauty and brains.


How do you hang out as a couple?

MC Abbey: We love watching movies together; we also have a couple's time out where we review the status of our relationship every quarter. We discuss our areas of conflict or misunderstanding and I ask her to mention things I do that are not pleasing to her. She is free to tell me how to improve on certain aspects of my character.   We pray together at the end of the review.

Jumoke:  We also enjoy each other's company a lot. We go out most times to watch one of his shows.  We dine out and go to the movies. Sometimes, we leave the kids at home and spend a night or two out in a hotel somewhere, just to make sure that we are constantly in tune with each other.

What changes has this relationship brought to your lives?

Jumoke: Being married to MC Abbey has brought me a lot more exposure. I'm a private person; I would rather be by myself and not seek out company, but that is no longer possible. Also, I can be so goal-oriented that I tread on people without considering their feelings, as long as I get my results. He has taught me to relax and smell the roses; that the process is as important as the result.

MC Abbey: She has changed me a lot. I am more prim and proper now. I was just a rugged and rough man but she has beaten me to shape. She tells me, 'Before I married you, you were not looking this handsome.' I do a lot of facials because of my wife; she takes me to the spa and does my manicure at home. She is my make-up artist.

How do you settle quarrels?

Jumoke: My husband always insists on thrashing out issues as they occur. No matter how long we need to talk to get to the point where we understand one another and agree on divergent issues, he will make sure we stay on the topic. Also, have a 'quarterly review,' like a date night, where we would examine what each party is doing that the other does not like, and make resolutions to change. The change will then be assessed at the next review.

MC Abbey: We work with the philosophy that people should not let their anger go down with the sun.  I don't like sweeping things under the carpet, sometimes she might want to say we should just forget about it but I would insist on discussing the issue.  I have learnt to always say, 'please, I am sorry, forgive me.' I don't need to be wrong or right.

What are the things you dislike about each other?

MC Abbey: There are some things she does that make me angry but I still love her for them. For instance, she is always too particular about how she looks. Sometimes she would say she is adding too much weight and she would run to the gym and I always warn her, 'If you want to lose weight, make sure you don't lose weight around your backside.'

Jumoke: Sometimes, my husband just can't be bothered to do certain things, even when it is something that appears to be important to me, such as taking proper care of documents, and not just putting them anywhere.

What do you do to keep the marriage strong?

Jumoke:  We pray together and for each other. We make time for one another, no matter how tight the schedule, no matter how short the time. He loves having my attention, and I try to make sure that 'his' time is not overridden by chores or caring for the kids. For both of us, the other person's satisfaction is more important.

MC Abbey: I have learnt to listen more to what she is saying, sometimes she can say a whole lot of things without saying a word and that is very deep.  I have grown to understand her silent language and speechless communications. I have also grown to understand the fact that I can't be better if she is not better.

Another Baby Dies in Nap Nanny Baby Recliner - Product Has Been Recalled as Dangerous

Posted: 04 Jun 2014 12:03 AM PDT


Do you use a baby recliner for your child? A sixth baby has died while using a recalled "Nap Nanny" infant recliner, with safety experts again urging parents to stop using the product.

According to the Consumer Product Safety Commission, or CPSC, the latest tragedy involved an 8-month-old girl from New Jersey. The baby suffocated while secured by a belt, trapped between the product and a crib bumper. CPSC officials said the infant was found stuck over the side of a Nap Nanny.


Picture - The Nap Nanny infant recliner was recalled in 2013 due to safety concerns. Pictured is a reenactment with a doll, provided by the CPSC, which demonstrates incorrect use of a Nap Nanny placed in a crib. cpsc.gov

CPSC Communications Director Scott Wolfson said parents should avoid the recliners at yard sales, as hand-me-downs or in online auctions.

"Our message to parents is clear: Stop using it. It's dangerous," Wolfson said. "There's been six deaths already, and we don't want another child to die unnecessarily."

About 165,000 Nap Nanny and Nap Nanny Chill recliners were sold between 2009 and 2012. Nap Nannies -- which are no longer sold in stores -- were recalled last year, but for months the company that made the portable recliner refused to pull it from shelves or offer refunds, instead insisting on the product's safety when used properly.

In a statement, an official with the company, now out of business for two years, told ABC News it was heartbroken for the families who have lost a child, but said the Nap Nanny was never intended for use in a crib.

Brian Thiel's 4-month-old daughter died in 2010 while using the Nap Nanny. His settlement agreement with the maker of Nap Nanny limited what he could say.

"There was a death almost a year prior to my daughter dying," Thiel said. "Had we known that, we never would have purchased this product."

It is illegal to sell the Nap Nanny in the United States, Wolfson said.

Via ABC
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